Boobahontas

Boobahontas

Government historians have supressed the truth for years but now the facts can be revealed. Believe it or not. There once lived a tribe of unusually stacked Englishwomen called the Soboobas. They led an isolated existence in the dense forests not far from Nottingham, where they lived off the land and also lapdanced for extra wampum. It was very difficult for ’em to find properly fitting brassieres so they dressed in fake brute skins. The Soboobas were raised by scouts for the Cleveland Indians and Atlanta Braves, who disciplined them in the art of Tomahawk swinging and pole lap dancing. At times, demented males (resembling LinseysWorld videographers) would stumble with out the forest, mumbling words that sounded like “hooters” and “tentpole.” No one believed their ridiculous babble until one brave, hopelessly crazy woman chaser returned with one hand clenched around a video cassette, the other round his peacepipe. The princess of the Soboobas was called Boobahontas. This is her story. Until Disney remakes it. Let’s roll the clip tape, and look at where you swing that ax, baby!

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